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yesterday,i was feeling so down n boerd,thinking of this life n wat i'm doing in it. things seems to be nt in their ryt places. i mess up so much this sem. i lost more dan i gain. i wasn't so in gd mood all the last year actually,it's really sumtin dissapointing. suddenlly i saw wat da society call"a dissabled person", smiling 2 me n great me wit salam. i begin 2 think n talk 2 myself: " are my problems same as his? are my diffeculties more dan his? y shld i b so sad? i'm healthy,n in a gd condition. i'm nt suffering frm any disease or in da middle of a war. y shld i feel so down? my problem or watever i'm in is far 2 simple frm wat others r facing. those who r in need for a drop of water ; those who r living a war situation ; those who doesn't hv anything 2 eat ... cheer up man, u r over reacting!!" . . . yes i'm over reacting, we shldn't think too deep abt our small matters, as long as we do our best, n ask help frm allah, i dun think we shld b so sad or worried..
well, jz for those who think dat lyf is missrable n doesn't worth it, try to pray "Istekhrah" , u ull ask ur lord 2 choose 4 . wat more do any1 wants?!

2 days unsleep, more than 5 tyms a day eating, totally bankrupted..MID-TERMS FINISHED!!! i'm so glad dat i finish my mid-terms b4 da begining of sem-break, after all that stressness n the tireness i can relax now n enjoy a gd free-week-sleeping..hehe.
nw i have around 2 weeks holiday,well nt exactly. i've begin it by joining my frends in their sports activity,we've playing football so regulary nw, n da same thing goes 4 volleyball..
bt still,without money life is nt so great..sheesh.. i hv 2 wait 4 da next month 2 receive my badget... well my plan nw 4 dis week..try to survive!!

My heart beat so strong n fast.. i don't lyk this signal,everytime this thing happend, a bad thing will occure.. i pray 2 allah dat it would stop doing so..
i skipped 2 of my classes 2day, i feel so tired n blur,no point frm going 2 lectures in this mood. . . things are nt quite well arnd me lately, i tend 2 waste my tym thinking of my problem, lyf must goes on, we don't usually hv to look so long at wat we hv lost... dat's wat my mind is thinking...

I really can't take anymore,i feel lyk i'm going to explode in any min. no matter how hard i tried,things turn out to be bad.. i tried my best in my studies, but yet the marks is not that satisfying.. i tried 2 maintain my badget, but yet i end up bankrube every month... i tried 2 be very kind, but yet some people are nt satisfied..maybe it's bcz they doesn't know the dark side of me, that y they say"wen were u nice?"... some people wen u do a singal mistake,they will 4get all ur gd deeds... i think if i get pushed jz a lil bit,da lion within me will b unleashed!! i dun think any1 want 2 see me at dat tym, neither I!!
i asked a frend:"y do people get hurts?", he replied:" bcz sometimes they expect more than they desearve!"...

i'm so down nw,i feel sooooo stupied n hopeless... i hurted someone so deeply,regardless if it's on purpose or nt .. i did it ...
though, dat one is very importent 2 me, tought me alot of things n ideas, help me 2 over come many diffeculities, share my joys n pleasures, stand wit me infront my pains...nw i lost everything..
i feel like i'm evil n mean..so rude n thankfulless..in dat person's eye.
all wat come frm da heart,goes directly 2 da heart..it was so painful...
i did something wrong,i confess ..bt listening 2 one side its really nt fair.. nt fair at all...

i promise myslef 2 keep my reason inside, it's enough dat i hurt sum1 b4 bcz of it..n i decided 2 suffer alone wen it happend..again.
All wat i can say is dat "silence suffering" is far too hard 4 me to handle, bt i won't let it go ..until i reach my limit!